Quotes by Jerry Seinfeld

A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking.

Jerry Seinfeld

It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.

Jerry Seinfeld

Men want the same thing from women that they want from their underwear... a little support, comfort, and freedom.

Jerry Seinfeld

Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.

Jerry Seinfeld

The whole object of comedy is to be yourself and the closer you get to that, the funnier you will be.

Jerry Seinfeld

There is no such thing as "fun for the whole family."

Jerry Seinfeld

There is no such thing as fun for the whole family.

Jerry Seinfeld

Those who profess to favor freedom, yet deprecate agitation, are men who want crops without planting up the ground. They want rain without thunder or lightening. They want the ocean without the awful roar of its many waters. The struggle may not be a moral one; or it may be a physical one; or it may be both moral and physical; but it must be a struggle. Power concedes nothing without a demand. It never did, and it never will.

Frederick Douglas »

To be able to practice five things everywhere under heaven constitutes perfect virtue...They are gravity, generosity of soul, sincerity, earnestness, and kindness.

Confucius »

What a crazy world we live in Trying to treat addiction as a legal problem, and trying to treat criminal misbehaviors using guns as a medical problem Beam me up, Scotty. Ain't no intelligent life down here.

Julie Cochrane »